Monday, March 10, 2008

We have a winner!

One person won the regional manager "not-coming-card" but can't accept her winnings ($4) until she eats a dinkie, which people are now calling a twindong again. It's as if "dinkie" was never decided which it was, but that is not important right now, just that we have a winner.

Humiliation for the day: Dinkie

At the end of the day we have to wrap up the day's contests and normally issue a humiliation. Today we combined the Twinkes and Ding dongs that I brought in from my humiliation into a new humiliation for losing the sneezing contest. At first is was called a twinkiedong, then atwindong, and we finally settled on a "dinkie." It has protein, it has calories, it is today's humiliation.

Tomorrow we will randomonly yell out poems we wrote for a rep on Friday. We are to direct our poems at our boss unbeknownst to her, it will be fun, it will be payment for losing a compeition. The competition was to win the poetry contest

***DURING POST - I just lost a point on the cell phone ring, I was bested - i hope to not be humiliated again so soon.

New competition: AT&T Robot voice.

We are all saying outlandish things on this service:

There are no clear rules, except that we can't talk each other with human voice, we are yelling in all accents possible and hear echos and each other typing.

The office is an echo chamber of insults, taunting, and called each other a bunch of not-so-nice things.

Welcome to the Competition Tracker Blog.


Do you work in a competitive workplace? I do.

In fact we have competitions all day. Some results go up on the Cadillac board, some are listed below. Please feel free to comment on our blog and come up with some ideas for this blog, the competition tracker blog.

Right now we have 3 big competitions going on, all which have their own humiliation. Here are active compeitions in no particular order

1. Who will sneeze most in the next 24 hours?
-two employees are using pepper, which we decided isn't against the rules
-one is talking about borrowing a dixie straw/borrow a dollar - photo on request.
-one is Googling resources on how to increase "sneezability"

***DURING POST* "Wonderful!" one employees sneezed turned into a laugh. He also added " I know how to do it now, your're in trouble." I assumed he found an answer on Google, what do you think he did?

- "I will skip lunch if i have too"
- "I can win too, a showlace up the nose!"
- "Computer noise of sneeze, deemed "fake"
 "Must in same room, camera photos of exact moment if not present, must be real sneeze"

2.Employee ringtone shoutout competition (on-going)
 -every time one employee's LG Chocolate phone rings this funky tone, we yell out either: "break it down" or "make it funky." I generally yell "Make it funky"
-*DURING POST*one employee called other employee phone for unfair advantage and was busted - deducted point
- *DURING POST*just earned one a point at 11:51pm central.

3. Will our regional manager come in today or not? (ends today)
-This one has been going on since Friday, most of the office lost already. One employee just went to lunch and told us all how we would lose and she would be "crowned"

4. One leg competition until work ends (Last Friday)
Last Friday Recap. During the last 35 minutes of work we had a one leg competition. The winner busted another employee for standing on one his foot and declared himself winner. 

(it was an unwritten rule that the leg be in the air, there are many unwritten rules that we call out when we see it and then it is immediately up for consensus)

 This exact technique was never mentioned in the rules however, so we had a 2nd, 3rd place competition "stand-off". It was much harder that we thought and both did poorly however, and I ended up bringing in a family pack of ding-dongs (the round cakes, not cylinder cakes) and a Mountain 'o' Twinkies I bought at an innercity Wal*Mart last night.


Kleenex is the key to the sneezing comp, but it will tickle and bother you all day - it is the gentley tickly way vs. the pepper straw and could touch your brain.